Book Review - girls really need to read this

I just finished reading "For Women Only," by Shaunti Feldhahn. It's written to women about how men think - mostly as a result of a detailed survey Shaunti took of over four hundred different men. It was an eye-opener, to say the least. Almost every page I was thinking, Wait, they really think that? It's pretty incredible. It explains, in men's words, things like

- Why love and respect are essentially the same to him
- Why he doesn't just want to provide, he needs to - and likes it that way
- What "men are visual" means in real life, and how women can help them
- Why the way we look matters to them

And soooooo much more than that. The real kicker is that they think we already know all that stuff. Maybe because we act like we know how men think. Well. Let me tell you, if you think you know, read this book and you'll be mentally kicking yourself for some of the things you've unwittingly thought, said, or done. I know I did. So.

For Women Only, by Shaunti Feldhahn. The teen version is For Young Women Only, same author. Read them - they're both fantastic books.


Leah

Understatement of the Year

I checked weather.com this afternoon to see the forecast for tonight, and it said "snow likely."


We have eight inches.

Geniuses work at weather.com.



Leah

And! Just adding to the last post! Plenty of couples love each other and think it's ok to sleep together before they're married! But Christians shouldn't be doing that, so what the heck kind of standard is that, anyway???

Do what's right.

Leah

Why I'm Waiting

Yesterday, a girl I know was celebrating her "anniversary" (note the quotation marks) of one year with her boyfriend. I use quotation marks around anniversary because I think it's really stupid and you can't have an anniversary until you're married. *eyeroll* Anyway, another person commented on said girl's facebook status and told her to give the BF a big hug and a kiss. To which I replied, "NOOOOOO!!! KISSING IS FOR MARRIED PEOPLE!!!" I meant it to be a little silly (even though I really believe that) because I knew she wouldn't care what I thought. Instead of taking it that way, she snapped back, "Actually, kissing is for anyone who wishes to do so, like a couple who love each other and believe it's ok." Well. Ok then. Excuse me for making you feel guilty.

But like I said, I really do believe you should wait until you're married to kiss, and here's why.
1. You ought to wait because you love him. Kissing is part of sex. It just is. And if you don't think so, you must be missing your sex drive or something. And I don't know an honest man in the world who would tell you that he's not turned on by kissing a girl. And if you're a Christian girl, you ought to do everything you can to help your man say pure before God. How can you say you love him when you're provoking him to sin? How unloving.
2. You ought to wait because he's worth it. News Flash: it wasn't meant to stop at a kiss. And if he's not worth waiting for, what are you doing dating him?
3. You ought to wait because kissing is a big deal. It's not just a kiss. It's the beginning of two becoming one, and if you're not married, you have no right to be starting that.

In addition to all of this, I have what I call a "very special" list, and a "no big deal" list. On the "no big deal" list are things like high fives, Facebook, and occasional emails. On the "very special" list are things like sex, kissing, and him putting his arm around me. I want that "very special" list to be as long as possible, because my relationship with my husband is going to be like no other. It's going to be wonderful. Amazing. Stunning. I want him to know when he marries me that he's getting everything. I don't even hold hands with other guys! I want him to know that he's my first and only for everything. He's the only one I'll say "I love you" to, the only one I'll hold hands with, the only one I lean on watching a movie...all the so-called little stuff. Because he's worth the wait, to me.

Someday, I'm going to come back here and let him read this, and look him in the eye and say, yes, you are worth waiting for.

Because he is.

I love him.


Leah

The Random Dozen!

1. How good are you at delaying gratification?
It depends. If we're talking apple pie here, not so good. Other stuff...I just tell myself I don't need it and walk away.

2. Maybe a marshmallow wouldn't be too difficult a temptation for you. What food (or anything else) would be most tempting?
See #1.

3. On a scale of 1-10 (10 being saintly) how patient are you?
Driving, like a 3. I can't stand stupid drivers. With kids, um...6? I'm working on it:P

4. Have you ever waited for something in life only to be disappointed upon realization of the goal/object/etc.?
Not that I can think of right this second.

5. Are you a person who takes shortcuts?
No, I just don't do stuff. Like makeup. Instead of doing the "five-minute face" I just don't wear any at all. I have way too much to do.

6. Which line is hardest to wait in?
The dinner line.

7. Did you wait to discover the gender of your unborn child until its birth?
I don't have kids yet, but I plan on finding out. The whole "surprise" thing just doesn't do anything for me.

8. Are you more patient with children or the elderly?
Definitely with kids. It's not their fault they're trained to be bratty - it's their parents' faults. The elderly, on the other hand, have no excuses. Suck it up.

9. Did you ever sneak a peek at a present?
No, but I told my sister what she got for her tenth birthday (Care Bear roller skates) once. And only once because I got a world-class spanking for that.

10. What is the longest you've ever waited for anything?
Twenty-one and a half years - for my husband. I'm still waiting and not getting the least bit impatient. He's worth it.

11. Who has more patience, you or your significant other?
Don't have a sig-o, but I'm sure he'll be more patient than me. I'm not the best at that.

12. Which of the following songs about waiting is your pick for the best? (OK, you may substitute another, if you like.)

A) Anticipation by Carly Simon
B) The Waiting by Tom Petty
C) Right Here Waiting for You by Richard Marx
D) Wait for Me by Rebecca St. James

D. I pray every day for my husband to be patient and wait for me like I've waited for him.


Enough random things about me? You should do the random dozen too:)

Leah

This is the Part They Don't Tell You About In College

I'm feeling rather sad lately. As my profile says, I'm a teacher, and I work at a middle school teaching orchestra and general music. Today, my second student was referred to the principal for drug possession. Yes, at a middle school. On top of that, I've reported two cases of abuse and one self-inflicted harm - cutting. I have a very heavy heart today. Where are the moms and dads? How can they not know - or worse, not care? A student told me today that one of her friends cut herself because a guy was pressuring her to have sex. A fourteen-year-old! What is wrong with this world? These are kids!
So this is what they don't tell you in college. They tell you about teaching methods, classroom management, special ed, and fundraising, but not this. They don't tell you about how your heart breaks for the little girl missing her daddy because he left her and her mom alone. They don't tell you about the boy who doesn't want to join a gang but is afraid he'll get hurt if he doesn't. Or about the girl who has such low self-esteem that she'll do anything to get her mom's attention, including hurt herself. They left out those parts. This is what makes teaching so hard.
So would you pray for my students? They don't come from good neighborhoods, and it's tough to stay out of trouble. It's hard to get good grades living out of a car. Please pray for them.


Leah

Immigration Policies Compared

I try to ignore the government as much as possible, but sometimes things really get to me. I didn't write this comparison, but I think it's accurate.


If you cross the North Korean border illegally you get 12 years hard labor.

If you cross the Iranian border you are detained indefinitely.

If you cross the Afghan border illegally, you get shot.

If you cross the Saudi Arabian border illegally you will be jailed.

If you cross the Chinese border illegally you may never be hear from again.

If you cross the Venezuelan border illegally you will be branded a spy and your fate will be sealed.

If you cross the Cuban border illegally you will be thrown into political prison to rot.

Yet if you cross the US border illegally you get:
A job
A driver's license
Social Security card
Welfare
Food stamps
Credit cards
Subsidized rent or a loan to buy a house
Free education
Free health care
A lobbyist in Washington
Billions of dollars worth of public documents printed in your language
And the right to carry your country's flag while you protest that you don't get enough respect.

Ok, I just wanted to make sure I had a firm grasp on the situation.

Makes you think, doesn't it?


Leah