Fashion, or the lack thereof.

     In the last year or two, I've become really interested in fashion. It's funny because I always was proud of the fact that I don't follow trends - I STILL don't follow trends, really. I hate skinny jeans and jeggings with a passion. I think platform heels look stupid. And I REALLY REALLY DESPISE the nerd glasses that people (whose vision is perfectly fine) are wearing as a fashion statement. The only statement THAT makes is that you have bad fashion.

 

*huff*

 

     Anyway. So I've become really interested in fashion. But somehow that interest has completely escaped SO many people at this blessed school. For instance:

 

     Girls here regularly wear a skirt that is too short to "check" (too short to be in dress code) with a longer skirt underneath it. As in TWO SKIRTS AT THE SAME TIME. It's so wrong! Why?! And the boys here seem to think that pants that are four inches too short are somehow . . . attractive? Yeah . . . I don't get it either. Add to that the girls with the "poured in" look and boys with tight pants and this campus is a fashion DISASTER. Prints and stripes do not go together, kids!! I'm thinking I need to have a fashion seminar. Not to make the boys metro or anything, just to give people guidelines for what looks nice and what looks trashy, since it's obvious that not a whole lot of people understand that concept. *eyeroll*

 

So.

 

Here are Stacy London and Clinton Kelly's four rules for interest in an outfit:

1. Color

2. Texture

3. Pattern

4. Shine

 

First, color. If you wear clothes that are all the color of old oatmeal, guess what you look like. Old oatmeal. Change it up. Mix a neutral with a bright accent color. It's why black, white, and red looks so cool.

Texture: Rock the snake-skin bag. Wear a suede blazer. Texture adds interest. Don't go crazy like wearing a feather boa to class or anything. But texture is fun. Try some.

Pattern: Pinstripes, guys. They're awesome. 'Nuff said. Ladies: prints and stripes together ARE NOT ACCEPTABLE. STOP. One pattern at a time, please!

Shine: Metallic shoes are so hot right now, girls. Boys: please do not wear metallic shoes. But a nice silk tie is appreciated.

 

And rules for looking nice in general:

1. Cut

2. Fit

3. Style

 

Cut: If you're short, don't wear skirts to the middle of your shin thinking it'll make you look taller. As a matter of fact, NO ONE should wear skirts that length. Yuck. Knee length looks good on everyone. And A-line. And unless you're Ashley Olsen skinny (which I do hope you're not - gross) pencil skirts are not a great plan. Plus they're almost always too tight andtight skirts are disgusting and immodest. This week I saw a girl with a skirt so tight it worked itself up while she was walking and she had to keep pulling it down.

 

Now that's attractive.

 

*eyeroll*

 

     Anyway, off the too-tight soapbox. Basically, wear clothes that are cut close to the body but NOT tight. You can look good without painting clothes on. GROSS. And pants should be straight down. As in skinny jeans do not fit the bill. They don't fit your behind either, for that matter. So please do not wear them. Ever. For any reason.

Fit: NOT TIGHT. BOYS. Stop with the tight pants! EEW. SO not attractive at. all. And girls, if your clothes are so tight it affects your breathing, please chill out and get a bigger size. Being a size 10 is not the end of the world, you know. Actually, it's pretty awesome. Seriously though. Enough with the gross/tight clothes. And don't you dare complain about the guys staring when you're dressed like a tramp.

Style: Everyone has a personal style. Just don't make yours say Sleaze or HiI'mPoor. Goodwill has decent clothes so you have no excuse.

 

And as my dear Lydia always says, there's a difference between dressing attractively and dressing to attract. Dress attractively. PLEASE.

 

 

 

Leah

Self-designated BJU Fashion Consultant

 

 

P.S. Two skirts at a time? REALLY?!?!